Mood: Missing a bear.
Listening to: A.M- Wavin goodbye to the train or the bus
Watching: Superman

Yawn... so.. another day nearing the end of the summer holidays. Another day closer to my death and another day closer to Struan coming back from his month long holiday. On which i won't be able to see him coming back because i'm off on holiday on the 7th again. Back to Malaysia... he's getting back on the 11th. Goddammit. I will be gone for ten days then and then when i come back it's a week left before school. Is that justice?? As many of the Sofarians know (AKA the people i sit with at school everyday and who are the insane and horny close friends of mine) yesterday i reached the edge of that crucial point in time when a loved one is on holiday. That was the point i realised how much i missed him and when i lost my sense of humor for a while.
Lol.

Got my commission piece printed out on canvas and presented it to Mr. Palmer 2 days ago He loved it. I know i should have worked it out before, but now we have to work on how much he's going to pay me... Hopefully about $500 hk which will help me out quite a bit. Not saving up for anything in particular but i do have to get out once in a while. Oh, just to add to that, HK is one of the most boring places. One of the most modern, yes, but wtf is with the late premier of movies?? WHY THE HELL IS PIRATES OF THE CARRIBEAN GOING TO COME OUT IN AUGUST??? Fucking fudge. And to help that out my friends and i are usually broke... i need a theraputic day out with Celenai, seriously. Because
A) I must not let the missingofmybear get to me
B) We haven't had a day out with each other in ages.
C) I have realized there is so much fucking angst and emoness among the people i know or know about. (And we need to bitch about that)
D) As well as bitch about the similarities and go shockgasphorror about comparisons about our lives.

Everyone seems to spend too much on unecessary things nowadays... i know this because of the recent purchuase my mom made. An all-in-one printer, scanner and copier that does everything that the other pieces of hardware we already purchuased does (pic: [link])(Oh, i think it looks pretty.). We already have my scanner. We have our little photo printer. We had our own printer (Which my brother took away anyway) and she had to buy this huge thing to take up space. Well i guess it's worked for our advantage. Now my scanner can stand gleamingly upright on my desk shelf where the printer used to be. No more bag in the corner for it to get scratched and kicked about. It is pretty, but i doubt we'll use it much anymore...
I realize now what a brilliant hobby drawing is. Digital especially. All you need is a pretty Wacom Tablet (Or just a tablet. Either way... you commoners...), Photoshop that you probably downloaded from the net or bought for a cheap price and... skill maybe? Or an inkling of a willingess and passion to produce art? Something like that anyway. Doesn't cost much. Stuff i usually would spend the most on would be my tablet. It's a one time thing though... my monthly ImagineFX magazine for fantasy and sci fi artists (which i intend to get a subscription on once i come up with 99 Pounds to pay for it all) and, well, anatomy books and crap like that.

Tata for now, i suddenly got bored about writing about myself. Sorry.

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Mood: lurved

As you can see from my featured deviation, a piece of my artwork was stolen from my gallery(Click here to read more... [link] ). Pondering on this throughout the day i realized how many more artists have had the same problem and they go through the same feelings of hate and revenge as well as even sometimes pity on those who have stolen their artwork claiming to be their own.

Imagine you find one of your creations stolen from you. So many things would be rushing through your head. Stuff like: What is the point really when it's not even your effort? Should you block your imagination from ever being displayed on the internet ever again- making it available to those creeps on the net that envy your skills? They'll just eventually steal what you've done, taking away the credit you know you deserve and taking in the 'pride' of having something as fabulous as your creation. It feels like shit, to put it bluntly. I felt like shit.
For the pity side of it, i can easily despise how low people would sink but i can also see the side where they are talentless idiots who cannot find anything better to do or just can't be bothered to learn for themselves. They are ignorant arsewipes who know nothing better than the right click and save for images they deem worthy to put on their own gallery and claim as theirs. Heh. Actually, just forget the pity. It's cold humor.
Now that you have found your piece on someone's gallery and have your brain teeming with dangerous thoughts involving lock- breaking devices, castration, leather bondage, whips, crocodile clips and dangerously high voltage, the thought's seem a little more distant once you realize that there is the chance of getting put in to jail blocking your way you decide to flame them. But if you ain't good at it, get a good friend who has the know-how, the guts and the brains to send a loving e-mail to senor(or senorita) mofo.
Then comes the waiting and waiting. If they give you shit, you will just have to continue spamming til they eventually do take the work down. Or take the long road and complain to the admin. The reply will take- what? Days? Weeks? Months? But it still won't stop theese bastards' from making another account and doing it all over again. Then the cycle continues. Making the problem larger(And helping out your paranoia) comes the knowledge that there are millions of idiots out there willing to steal what you've done.
What's the world coming to?

Thus i present to you this plaque of originality:

Use it well, use it wisely. Use it well by posting it up on your journal if you can like i am, pasting it on your DevID or just using it as your webcam pic.
Use it wisely by sticking to those proudly embossed words and making sure you never steal. For it's sick and stupid and you will also get hordes of flamers and fans storming your gallery stronghold. Oh, and they will remember your email address once they get their hands on it. So watch out.
Thanks and enjoy
Love, Asenceana

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Mood: lurved
Listening to: When The Sun Goes Down- Arctic Monkeys
Reading: The cry of Icemark

Yay for paranoia. And insecurity.

Put your music player on shuffle. Press forward for each question. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if they don't make sense. You'll be surprised though. NO CHEATING!!! Give us a sample of the song's lyrics that best fit the question.

How am I feeling today?
Bohemian Rhapsody(Parody)- Weird Al Yankovic
"Is this the real life-
Is this just fantasy-
Caught in a landslide-
No escape from reality-
Open your eyes
Look up to the skies and see-
Im just a poor boy,i need no sympathy-
Because Im easy come,easy go,
A little high,little low,
Anyway the wind blows,doesnt really matter to me,
To me"

What is the best thing about me?
Homecoming(and the rest of them. This one's Rock and Roll Girlfriend Boyfriend. Let's change it to Boyrfiend for the sake of my sanity shall we?)- Greenday

I got a rock and roll band (Wanted to, but in the end, never had. Tried though)
I got a rock and roll life (Weeelll... I love Greenday? I have a guitar and i love rock music?)
I got a rock and roll girlfriend Boyfriend(mmmk.^^)
And another ex-wife(YOU WERE NOT MEANT TO KNOW THAT)
I got a rock and roll house(I'm sorry but no.)
I got a rock and roll car(Hehe i wish)
I play the shit out the drums(Nup, but my boyfriend does. Apparently. I have yet to hear him play.)
And I can play the guitar(Oo yis)
I got a kid in new york(Something you shouldn't know again.)
I got a kid in the bay(And this.)
I haven't drank or smoked nothin'(Yer)
In over 22 days(Ignore)
So get off my case
(This is the most relevant thing i could find. Believe me- the rest of the song was about coffee, jesus, drugs and angst. And very random other stuff.)

How do my friends see me?
The Fool on the Hill- The Beatles (GOOD LORD...)
Well on his way, his head in a cloud,
The man of a thousand voices, talking perfectly loud.
But nobody ever hears him,
Or the sound he appears to make.
And he never seems to notice ..... (wut...)

What is my best friend's theme song?
YOU PROBABLY COULDN'T SEE FOR THE LIGHTS BUT YOU WERE STARING STRAIGHT AT ME- Arctic Monkeys (This is from every guys point of view towards you, obviously babe)
One look sends it coursing through the veins oh how the feeling races
Back up to their brains to form expressions on there stupid faces
They don't want to say hello
Like I want to say hello
Oh the heartbeats at its peak when you're coming up to speak
And I'm so tense, never tenser
Could all go a bit Frank Spencer?
I'm talking gibberish, tip of the tongue but I can't deliver it
...Properly, oh it’s all getting on top of me
And if it weren't this dark you'd see how red my face has gone

Everybody's trying to crack the jokes and that to make you smile
Those that claim that they're not showing off are drowning in denial
They're not half as bad as me say anything and I'll agree
When it comes to acting up, I'm sure I could write the book

And now that you’re more than a part in the play
It’s slightly easier to think what to say
You had us all, standing on our heads
Doing our best tricks

Never again, will there be another one that's as desirable as you
Hehehe you should be proud you have this effect

How does the world see me?
View From The Afternoon- Arctic Monkeys (Yes i do like them.)
Anticipation has the habit to set you up (Um)
For disappointment in evening entertainment but
Tonight there’ll be some love
Tonight there’ll be a rawkus, regardless of what’s gone before
(Whut....)

Do people secretly lust after me?
This Love- Maroon 5(Why do i even have them on my playlist...)
I was so high I did not recognize
The fire burning in her eyes
The chaos that controlled my mind
Whispered goodbye and she got on a plane
Never to return again
But always in my heart

This love has taken it’s toll on me
She said goodbye too many times before
And her heart is breaking in front of me
I have no choice cause I won’t say goodbye anymore

How is my life going?
Champagne for my real friends, real pain for my sham friends- Fall Out Boy
The sounds of this small town make my ears hurt (make my ears hurt)
Oh yeah, you caught me. But I caught you one worse
They say, "You want a war? You've got a war."
But who are you fighting for?
The tides out, the ship's run aground
We drown traitors in shallow water
(Good lord i don't have that much angst in my life)

What should I do with my life?
Jesus Of Suburbia(And the Rest. This is Tales of Another broken home)-Greenday
To live and not to breathe
Is to die In tragedy
To run, to run away
To find what you believe
And I leave behind
This hurricane of fucking lies
I lost my faith to this
This town that don't exist (Hong Kong people do really suck.)

So I run
I run away
To the light of masochist
And I leave behind
This hurricane of fucking lies
And I walked this line
A million and one fucking times
But not this time

I don't feel any shame
I won't apologize

When there ain't nowhere you can go
Running away from pain
When you've been victimized
Tales from another broken home

What was today like?
Holiday- Greenday (now i had to cheat to get to this. but it was on shuffle. What was i mean to do huh??? I got songs like GAY BAR and WAKE ME UP WHEN SEPTEMBER ENDS!!!(Before i got to this..)
Can I get another Amen? (Amen!)
There's a flag wrapped around a score of men (Hey!)
A gag, a plastic bag on a monument

I beg to dream and differ from the hollow lies
This is the dawning of the rest of our lives
On holiday
(Well at least it is actually Holday for me)

What is in store for this weekend?
Vertigo- U2
Hello hello
I’m at a place called Vertigo(How nice. The edge of pure death.)
It’s everything I wish I didn’t know
Except you give me something I can feel, feel

The night is full of holes
As bullets rip the sky
Of ink with gold
They twinkle as the
Boys play rock and roll
They know they can’t dance
At least they know….
(Well sounds like fun!)

What was high school like?
From the Ritz to the Rubble- Arctic Monkeys
So step out the queue
He makes examples of you
And there's nowt you can say
Behind they go through to the bit where you pay
And you realize then that it's finally the time
To walk back past ten thousand eyes in the line
And you can swap jumpers and make another move
Instilled in your brain you've got something to prove
To all the smirking faces and the boys in black
Why can't they be pleasant?
Why can't they have a laugh?
(oh felt have i the painful humiliation from teachers many a time. Lets put it that way shall we)

Who will you marry?
King for a Day- Greenday
King for a day, princess by dawn.
King for a day in a leather thong.
King for a day, princess by dawn.
Just wait 'til all the guys get a load of me.
(.................o_0 Should i be cautious?)

Where will I get married?
Boogie Wonderland- Earth, Wind and Fire (Wtf am i gonna be high or something)
All the love in the world can't be gone
all the need to be loved can't be wrong
All the records are playing
and my heart keeps saying
"boogie wonderland, wonderland"
dance boogie wonderland
dance boogie wonderland

What is the story of my life?
Basketcase- Greenday
Do you have the time
To listen to me whine
About nothing and everything
All at once(Thank you Celia, you we're always there to do so )
I am one of those
Melodramatic fools
Neurotic to the bone
No doubt about it

Sometimes I give myself the creeps (oooo yes....)
Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me
It all keeps adding up
I think I'm cracking up
Am I just paranoid?
Or I'm just stoned(I do wonder that..)

How can I make myself happy?
Fly me to the moon- Frank Sinatra
Fly me to the moon
And let me play among the stars
Let me see what spring is like
On Jupiter and Mars (What? Might be interesting...)
In other words hold my hand
In other words darling kiss me
(Oh yes )

What do you think of your bf?
I bet that you look good on the dancefloor- Arctic Monkeys
Stop making the eyes at me, I'll stop making the eyes at you
And what it is that surprises me, is that I don't really want you to
And your shoulders are frozen, cold as the night
Over you're an explosion, you’re dynamite(Booyah)
Your name isn't Rio, but I don't care for sand
Lighting the fuse might result in a bang
(And i have seen him on the dancefloor... definitely a hot fuse )

What does he think of you?
Don't look back in anger- Oasis
So Ill start a revolution from my bed
cuz you said the brains I had went to my head
Step outside, summertimes in bloom
Stand up beside the fireplace
Take that look from off your face
You aint ever gonna burn my heart out (That makes me feel good to know^^)
(And... thats good right?)

What should your ex(s) have known?
American Idiot- Greenday
Don't wanna be an American idiot.
Don't want a nation under the new media.
And can you hear the sound of hysteria?
The subliminal mindfuck America.

How will you die?
Seven sunny days in June- Jamiroquai
The pebbles you've arranged
In the sand they're strange
they speak to me like to constellations as we lie here
There's a magic I can't hold
your smile of honey gold
(Sounds nice...)

What song will they play at my funeral?
Born Free(My mum told me to download this for her school play==' She's a kindi teacher)-Hans Zimmer
Its an Instrumental
I laughed when i heard this as the answer for this question. And i'm still chuckling.

This quiz is utterly crap. Or it's just my playlist. Probably is my playlist. I had to 'cheat' so many times, not because i didn't like what the songs were saying, but because they didn't have the fuck to do with the question.

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Mood: lurved
Listening to: When The Sun Goes Down- Arctic Monkeys
Reading: The cry of Icemark

Yay i've reached my 10 K pageview mark^^ Thanks everyone

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Mood: lurved
Listening to: When The Sun Goes Down- Arctic Monkeys
Reading: The cry of Icemark

... just because.

Struan- There's just no need to explain, love. Your just somebody i never knew could change my life and make it amazing. I love you. Thank you.

Celia- Thank you so much sister. All these years of putting up with me. Wow. You are my shoulder to cry on, my agony aunt, love guru, shopping sister, teacher and just a treasure of a best friend. And have been forever. Thank you.

Sarah- Another person who deserves great recognition of putting up with me. For over ten years. Holy shits. Now you and Celia are matched so don't even bother fighting over me. You both knows you love me Struan, don't worry.
Sarah, even though we're in different schools and spend a considerably less amount of time shopping, agonizing, crying, and creating schemes of pulling (So far you've come up with telling your crushes that they look like buckets. Great tactic. And i don't exactly need tactic. Cause i just happened to recieve my bear by being overly hyper and i'm proud of it) There's no reason that you should even not be my sister too, equally hyper and over excited...bucket. Thank you.

Gary- Your a pillock, but a caring stubborn and great one. I know the feeling is mutual. Thank you.

Cray- You made me realize things about myself. Thank you.

Ross- Clueless about love and what a real man should do. My advice, wear
Pink. Only real (Horny)men do. But thank you for being so great as just a person to chat to whenever i am bored or need a good rant and just being a great brother to me. Thank you.

James- Heh. Remember, let those uni girls just flock to you... you don't need me to kick anyone's arse for you in uni. I thought you could do it yourself?
Anyway, youv'e become like a big brother. A horny big brother. Umh. For otherpeopleANYWAY. Thank you for... everything else. Just being there. Excluding hornyness.

Poojah- Umh.. continue with the Cattery. Good luck with the dominatrix stuff too. Thanks for just being a little ball of hyper and randomishness.

And of course there are those others who are searching for their names here, but i must dash off. Sorry if your not added but i have a bloody exam tomorrow...Textiles. Thats the majority of the Sofa People(AKA 'Sofanarians!' Says Ross.) of 2005-2006. I wil update the rest when i can.

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